POV: A 19-year-old with 26 years of experience...

How many times have you gone to professional development and the facilitator starts with an ice breaker question? I know we all love those… There is one particular question that I love to answer, and it is “if you could be any age again, what would it be and why?”

My answer is always 19. It took me a while to figure out why being 19 was so special to me, but I’ve realized its significance over time. At 19, I was a confident college student and life was {simply} simple. And four days before turning 20, I crossed the burning sands with seven of the most outstanding DST line sisters on the face of the planet.

I don’t know what happened to the spirit of my 19-year-old self or even when I lost it. Maybe somewhere between graduating college twice, putting my needs aside to serve others, and all things in between.

I desperately want to find my way back to the joy I had in my last year as a teenager, but lately, I’ve been trying to dig myself out of a hole that feels like it has grown the size of the Hoover Dam.

Although I no longer feel like “myself”, I am realizing that I will never feel like I did at the age of 19…because I’m not 19 years old anymore and life isn’t as simple as it was back then. So, I need to stop trying to be who I was and begin to own my identity as an adult.

Life hasn’t been all bad in the 26 years since being a 19-year-old. I have learned valuable lessons; some deep and insightful and some shallow and self-gratifying.

So to celebrate my 45th birthday today, I will share some of the lessons that I have learned in the last 26 years.

• Jesus AND Therapy.

• I can wear a red lip on a Monday.

• I will never outgrow needing my parents.

• The Lord cares about the little things in my life!

• Partial obedience is disobedience.

• It’s just hair-it will grow back.

• My mother was right!

• It’s ok to not be ok.

• There are some Thoughts too sacred to share.

• I love being an Aunt.

• I am not my sons’ only influence.

• I have control issues-there, I admitted it.

• If I like it, I will buy it in every color.

• I love a good bubble bath.

• I have to actually go outside if I want my husband to find me.

  
  

  

  
  

• It’s never too late to change my mind.

• Mourning the death of a friend is an indescribable pain.

• My love language depends on the mood I'm in at the time-right now it's GIFTS!

• I find joy in celebrating others.

• I don’t like being ignored.

• I need to be prepared for anything if I receive a “Hey mom” text.

• I know when it’s time to order more groceries based on the amount of Dr. Pepper that I have.

• Ask for what I want.

• I’m not a “we got food at home” type of mom.

• Other than concerts or live shows, I don't like going places with large crowds.

• Naps are not just for children.

I think I will always reflect on my confident 19-year-old self, but now I can appreciate that time for what it was and find ways to show up more confidently 26 years later.

Now, it's time to celebrate- Cheers to 45 Years!

To honor my 45th birthday, I'm accepting love through your donations to our Soul Survivors group. Navigate to the Home page and complete the donation form. Your donations will be used to send monthly care packages to the cancer survivors who are a part of our group.

Your state of residence has to be completely spelled out when entering your card information.

If you or someone close to you is a cancer survivor, I encourage you to join our community. Send me an email for an invitation to our communication thread.

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Train of Thought will be taking a Spring Brain Break and return in May. In the meantime, catch up on any missed blogs, reread and share your favorites, like and follow our business partners' social media accounts, subscribe, comment, and/or kindly send a donation to Soul Survivors.

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I'll be thinking of you!